Nudity & Public Exposure

We spend about 99% of our lives with these layers and fabrics hanging off our body, yet every once in a while you suddenly get the feeling that it’s just so unnatural and suddenly become very conscious of the foreign threads rubbing against your skin.

The VERY FIRST thing I did when I moved out of my parents house was strip. And I continued to walk around doing everything butt-naked for a few days. There’s nothing sexual or perverted about it, it’s not like I cover myself in body oil and stand in front of a mirror striking playboy poses…because I don’t. It just feels natural, and I’m sure that those of you who’ve tried this can agree that it is sooo incredibly liberating! Sitting on the sofa watching TV (I like to tell this story to guests when they’re here sitting on the sofa), listening to music, cooking, reading, etc. My favorite is making tea then drinking it in the balcony. No, don’t start freaking out, I live on the 15th floor and can’t be seen by anyone. So I just stand there on the balcony, nude and rude, sipping tea, watching all the silly fully-dressed people running around like ants in the world below, constricted and violated by their modern ‘attire’. Sometimes I do my naked chicken dance just for the hell of it.

Unfortunately, I had to stop doing this when one day, I made tea and strode proudly out into the balcony nude as usual, only to find window cleaners hovering meters outside my apartment. I played it cool, smiled and said ’saleimo aleikom’ as they stood on their little platform, their hands frozen mid wipe with their mouths hanging wide open, and confidently walked back in. Coincidentally they stopped cleaning my windows ever since, they just skip the whole floor…

It really is a crime we don’t have any of those nifty Nudist Colonies here in Egypt, I would totally be the first one there. But it would never happen because it would just become 1000 naked Arab men standing around waiting for a woman and I think it would be the same in any Arab country. I heard they have some in Dubai, but I’m definitely not going to travel to a foreign country just to stand around naked. I’m crazy but I’m not stupid.

Sometimes I envy Frank. “You get to fly around AND be naked in public?? Lucky bastard…”

p.s. This post was written completely in the nude.

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